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Stephanie
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The Book as a Whole: The Secret to Marriage

What is the secret of marriage (p. 234) that Manuel tells Don Juan? Do you agree with it? What is the secret that Serena tells him? Do you agree with her advice? What do you think is the nature of love and the secret to a joyous lifelong commitment to one other person? Do you think the passion and love that Manuel and Serena have can be maintained throughout a lifetime? What role models of True Passionate Love have you encountered?


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Note: This topic refers to the book as a whole.

Stephanie
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smg5775
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Re: The Book as a Whole: The Secret to Marriage



Stephanie wrote:

What is the secret of marriage (p. 234) that Manuel tells Don Juan? Do you agree with it? What is the secret that Serena tells him? Do you agree with her advice? What do you think is the nature of love and the secret to a joyous lifelong commitment to one other person? Do you think the passion and love that Manuel and Serena have can be maintained throughout a lifetime? What role models of True Passionate Love have you encountered?

Manuel tells Don Juan that the secret of marriage to feel and know all women through one woman. I feel that emotions are similar in all but the depth of an emotion will change from person to person. Because of life experiences and personalities are different in each person, to believe to know one woman is to know all is a false notion. I believe you can learn about one woman and come to know her and it will take a lifetime to really know a particular woman or man. As a person matures, they will change, usually for the better. They become more mellow, more gentle, more wise, more able to endure the knocks life throws at them. A person becomes, hopefully, more well rounded.

Serena believes true love is not in what you feel but in what you do. I think I believe Serena's advice is more realistic. Feelings go through ups and downs. Sometimes you get really mad at a person but you ride it through because you have a shared history. You know life goes in cycles and that the bad will go and the good will come again. You don't stray but stay and try to work things out because I have found that this too shall pass.

I do believe what Manuel and Serena have is true passionate love. They have a history together and the share interests. They come from similar backgrounds and enjoy each other. Their actions are full of humor and warmth. They seem to have private jokes and are happy to be with each other. They also can shut the world out when necessary.

The people who I've seen that have a true, passionate love are older people. Many have married late in life but are genuinely fond of each other. I see it in their teasing. They are comfortable with themselves and the comfortableness cares over into their relationship.

Sheila
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DouglasAbrams
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Re: The Book as a Whole: The Secret to Marriage



smg5775 wrote:


Stephanie wrote:

What is the secret of marriage (p. 234) that Manuel tells Don Juan? Do you agree with it? What is the secret that Serena tells him? Do you agree with her advice? What do you think is the nature of love and the secret to a joyous lifelong commitment to one other person? Do you think the passion and love that Manuel and Serena have can be maintained throughout a lifetime? What role models of True Passionate Love have you encountered?

Manuel tells Don Juan that the secret of marriage to feel and know all women through one woman. I feel that emotions are similar in all but the depth of an emotion will change from person to person. Because of life experiences and personalities are different in each person, to believe to know one woman is to know all is a false notion. I believe you can learn about one woman and come to know her and it will take a lifetime to really know a particular woman or man. As a person matures, they will change, usually for the better. They become more mellow, more gentle, more wise, more able to endure the knocks life throws at them. A person becomes, hopefully, more well rounded.

Serena believes true love is not in what you feel but in what you do. I think I believe Serena's advice is more realistic. Feelings go through ups and downs. Sometimes you get really mad at a person but you ride it through because you have a shared history. You know life goes in cycles and that the bad will go and the good will come again. You don't stray but stay and try to work things out because I have found that this too shall pass.

I do believe what Manuel and Serena have is true passionate love. They have a history together and the share interests. They come from similar backgrounds and enjoy each other. Their actions are full of humor and warmth. They seem to have private jokes and are happy to be with each other. They also can shut the world out when necessary.

The people who I've seen that have a true, passionate love are older people. Many have married late in life but are genuinely fond of each other. I see it in their teasing. They are comfortable with themselves and the comfortableness cares over into their relationship.






Interesting points. I definitely agree that the proof of true passionate love is in the longevity and vitality of a relationship. Manuel and Serena's love was definitely a model for me of how deep love, comfort, and enduring passion can sustain over the years. I'm glad you felt the truth of their love. I agree that all women, like all men, are different and that perhaps it is not possible to know each and every woman through one woman, but the depth of womanhood or manhood, can I believe be known through one woman or man. Don Juan discovers from Manuel that he does not need to swallow the world and know all women to discover this profound depth that he has only tasted. And yes, I think discovering the depth of a person is a lifelong endeavor.

Warmly,

Doug
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