Fran

[kiakar]

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chefdjsb wrote:

I agree that Fran didn't seem to show much hysteria and while I don't feel as if anyone else really did either, I would have expected it from a mom. In the very early chapters I got the impression that Fran was aloof; not around/aware much and busy with her career. Maybe she's stifling Lindsay because Kim's disappearance has reawakened her.

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It would be normal to feel the way Fran is feeling. God did not make any of us the same. We all have a different style of living, working, dying and whatever. So she shows her grief differently than what others think she should. We all show it but not in the same way.  Some are numb and cant show it and others keep their frustration inside as long as possible.  Being stricter on Lindsay too, is a normal reaction. When I use to hear of things happening to other teens, I became more aware of my teens and made them have stricter curffews and such. My daugher would say "Oh I hope Mama doesnt hear about this girl or I will never be able to date again."  And thi sis typical behavior from a mom.

[kiakar]

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krb2g wrote:

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COCOSPALS wrote:

There is something about Fran that raised the hairs on the back of my neck. She seems to become "super-mom" when her child disappears.

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I agree with this eerie feeling: Fran's involvement in the search for Kim, especially as time goes by, and they start holding all the events (like releasing the balloons on the baseball field, using the "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" song and pictures Kim would have hated, and holding two memorial services), strikes me as self-absorbed, and more about her own desire for closure than anything else. While I definitely have pity for her, her response to the tragedy seems selfish, and I find myself frustrated by her character.

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 I really feel this was keeping Fran above water. Where some mothers would be numb and not move from a bed or chair, she moves and can't stop moving. This again, is a way she is coping with this tradegy. I dont think she is feeling a thing for herself, her goal is set, to find Kim or find out what happened to her. In other words, she is not thinking logically.  A daze is what people call this I think.

[vivico1]

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DSaff wrote:

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Everyman wrote:
While there isn't (yet?) a thread for her, Lindsay is the one I feel sorriest for. Not only is she the closest, certainly in age and I think also emotionally, to Kim, but her life to come is going to be much more circumscribed than Kim's ever was. As the only remaining child, she is going to be mother-henned by Fran to an almost cloying extent.

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I absolutely agree with you. Lindsay is the forgotten one here. As the younger sibling she naturally feels that she is in her sister's shadow. Now that she if missing, I'm sure she wondered if she would ever escape it. She had the final family moments with Kim. She was the last to have quality time with her. I think Lindsay wants to scream, cry, shout, and most of all, help search for her sister.

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I agree DSaff. I also think tho, that because she's so much in her sister's shadow, that actually, Fran won't motherhen her later on. I think she will get shut out even more. They are shutting her out now from the few things that would make her feel better about doing something herself at least. Especially Fran. I think Fran is a runner, she doesn't want to face reality, if its uncomfortable, whether its her relationship to her husband or her kids, or their relationship to their father that she doesn't have with them. I think she needs order. Thats not a bad thing really, but its not really a virtue either if it has to be at the price of relationships. Right now, she is running from the thoughts and feelings of what is going on in a couple of ways. One should be helpful, and thats all the work she is doing on the computer and organizing, to try to find Kim fast. But also its consuming the moments of her feelings that need to be shared with her family and they feel left out or even like they are not doing as much as she is, but its a kind of shutting down to them and her own feelings. The other way she is running from this reality and others thats she can't ignore (as she may in life) is through the sleeping pills and wine. Sometimes being a doer is great, but sometimes being a doer is to keep from being a feeler or a sharer.

[jdmiller212]

I am amazed at how little attention Fran is giving her younger daughter, Lindsey.  It seems like Kim is the only one of importance and Lindsey is just there.  I realize Lindsey is trying to hide and feels that they do not understand where she is coming from, but I think they should be a little more concerned about where this is taking their younger daughter.  Fran is so busy planning interviews and fundraisers, she seems to have forgotten she has another daughter.  I realize that this is probably how Fran is handling Kim's missing, but it sounded like Fran was involved alot in these kind of things before Kim went missing.  I do feel that Fran needs to have her husband handy, but sometimes makes him sound like he can't do anything for hisself like fix supper.  I guess I really can't figure the woman out.

[fordmg]

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kmensing wrote:

Though it's still early in the book, I'm really not liking Fran.  I really thought that she isn't showing enough hysteria for a parent of a missing child.  I think, how can a parent of a missing child not at some point, even in a locked bathroom, shower or closet, simply break down weeping.

And poor Lindsay.  I'm thinking that Kim's always been the chosen one, and Lindsay very well knows it.

kmensing

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Well, Fran did take drugs every night to sleep.  They do become adictive after a while.  She is coping by filling her days with activities.  When all that is gone - then she will have time to break down.  It will come eventually.

MG

[vivico1]

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kmensing wrote:

Though it's still early in the book, I'm really not liking Fran. I really thought that she isn't showing enough hysteria for a parent of a missing child. I think, how can a parent of a missing child not at some point, even in a locked bathroom, shower or closet, simply break down weeping.

And poor Lindsay. I'm thinking that Kim's always been the chosen one, and Lindsay very well knows it.

kmensing

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You know, quite frankly for me so far, I hear descriptions of what people are doing or saying but I really don't hear or feel any real hysteria or the kind of anguish I would expect from any of them right now. I mean, there are descriptions, but I am not "feeling" it right now, something is missing in the telling of the story to me. The set up,learning some about everyone is great. The initial fear for me as the reader of, oh my, what has happened to her, is in the suspense of the initial details, but I am not feeling it directly from the people in the story. Know what I mean? The idea of a girl going missing is scary, and draws you in, but I just am not getting it out of the characters in the way I would think, not yet at least. Maybe that will change. I hope so, cause there are enough characters here for someone to be feeling that utter anguish rather than just putting it down, to oh she or he is in shock initially, if it were just a mother or father we were hearing about for example. Someone would be reacting more, even with the shock, someones feelings would be just immense! I am not getting that and that part of getting into the story is not working for me. Again, now anyway.

[chefdjsb]

Thank you and I do agree that everyone handles grief in different ways. I think vivico1 put it better than I did, I'm just not 'feeling it' from any of the characters and I expected more emotions from everyone. I didn't care much for Fran either (that balloon ceremony, wow), but I don't really feel connected or like I 'know' any of them. I sympathize with Lindsay most of all, but even there I don't feel much going on.

[Loverofbooks]

I tend to agree that Fran seemed to be "needy" throughout and that although she did seem to get stronger by the end of the story, she still left a lot to be desired in a mother.  She didn't seem as disturbed by the disappearance of Kim as I thought she should have.  She almost seemed calm.  Her treatment of Lindsay was disgraceful, especially after Kim went missing.  It just reaffirmed what Lindsay thought about the fact that Fran seemed to like Kim more than her.  Teenagers are very emotional in good times, so the fact that the "favorite daughter" went missing, was a very traumatic  happening for her.  No one seemed to care about her.

[caseylc]

I struggled with Fran.  At times and liked her character.  I liked her ambition and drive.  She did not give up and was determined to fight.  The Ambien induced sleep and wine made her weak to me and I wanted her strength to be persistant (obviously impossible).

[KxBurns]

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ELee wrote:

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DSaff wrote:

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Everyman wrote:
While there isn't (yet?) a thread for her, Lindsay is the one I feel sorriest for. Not only is she the closest, certainly in age and I think also emotionally, to Kim, but her life to come is going to be much more circumscribed than Kim's ever was. As the only remaining child, she is going to be mother-henned by Fran to an almost cloying extent.

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I absolutely agree with you. Lindsay is the forgotten one here. As the younger sibling she naturally feels that she is in her sister's shadow. Now that she if missing, I'm sure she wondered if she would ever escape it. She had the final family moments with Kim. She was the last to have quality time with her. I think Lindsay wants to scream, cry, shout, and most of all, help search for her sister.

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Ditto on these points.  I would not want to be Lindsay for the world!  She has no where to go and no one to talk to and her parents behavior only serves to isolate her further.  In particular, her mother seems very selfish and insensitive by expecting Lindsay's reaction to her sister's disappearance to mirror her own.   

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I don't want to stifle your discussion in any way, but don't forget that per the schedule I posted, we'll have a thread for Lindsay the week of 6/16. As is typical for poor Lindsay, she'll be sharing our attention with Kim that week

Message Edited by KxBurns on 06-02-2008 06:35 PM

[Beachdre]

I can understand how Fran fell into the drinking & taking sleeping pills pattern.  When something that tragic happens in your life, I think you would want it to all go away.  Drinking & drugging can do that for you.

I think she felt a bit lost when Kim went missing & found her role to be the one to continually set everything right & go on TV, and be the spokesperson for all the missing people.  I, myself, don't think I could do that, I feel I would rather be in one of the search parties. 

I also think she should have tried to do a better job of getting Lindsay out of her bedroom. with one child missing, don't let the other child become lost in your home.

Dre

[KxBurns]

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thekoolaidmom wrote:

I think a major growing moment for Fran was when she was Christmas shopping.  When she was looking at the necklaces, she realized she'd always shopped for herself through them.  Her chance to buy the new styles and wear them vicariously.  She realized it had always been about her.

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Koolaidmom, I agree that the Christmas shopping trip was a pivotal experience for Fran. I didn't read it as you did, though. I thought Fran's epiphany in this chapter had more to do with coming face to face -- for probably the first time -- with the reality of her loss. Her idling over the necklaces highlighted how well she was attuned to each daughter's individual tastes. Her desire to buy the butterfly again is representative of her determination to buy presents for Kim this year, and I think at that point she finally realized the depth of her denial. She wanted the butterfly to replace the one that's gone, as if she can bring Kim back as well.

I didn't think she had been buying things for her daughters that she herself actually wanted so much as buying them things that fit who she wanted her daughters to be.

That was my take on it, anyway   But Fran sure is a complicated woman!

[KxBurns]

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jawilt26 wrote:

I did not much like Fran she was way self absorbed. She didn't see that her daughter Lindsey and Her husband were hurting and needed her. I think it was great that she made did start the ball rolling with organizing the search and getting the word out there but she couldn't get out of that frame of mind when she was home alone with the rest of the family. As the book progressed she started to shove the disappearance down people's thoats with her tv appearances and appearances at the footballs games and such I was just really annoyed with her as the story progressed. 

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As others have said, Fran really does come into her own with her efforts to find Kim. And I can see how that may eventually seem like she enjoys the limelight that the search efforts incur. But I thought her perseverence and her refusal to sort of "turn it off" at some point was pretty realistic. She's aware that the window of opportunity for media interest is fairly short, and she's trying to keep Kim's story in the spotlight as much as she can until the next sensational missing person story eclipses theirs.

I can't help but imagine how desperate I would be if I were in her shoes!

[reina10]

I agree with you. I believe their marriage was suffering and they were all living in their own world. The early chapters portray Kim as a teenager that doesn't seem to have any boundaries. Honestly, i didn't like her. I felt she was self-centered and condescending.
As for Fran, she seemed to be completely disconnected until her daughter goes missing. It's strange. Maybe she needed something drastic to happen before she became involved.

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MARISSAD115 wrote:

I think the first impression of Fran is that she and her husband don't have the best marriage, or they are drifiting apart almost, and I think Kim going missing gave them a connection and helped bring them closer together. I think before losing Kim she had thought she had given her too much freedom, and she cracked down more on poor Lindsay as a result. If you remember Lindsay had to stay at soemone's house after school while the parents worked or were out, wasn't really allowed to drive too far, and was hounded by Fran. I mean this is a result of them not wanting to lose her too, but there is one part in the book where Fran says this comment to Lindsay later on, and Lindsay's thoughts to herself were "too late".

I think her reaction to being kept busy looking for Kim and organizing things was a good role for her, b/c it suited her personality and her idea of always being in controlf of things.

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[Nitestar]

I agree with many posters here.  Fran seemed to be extremely needy early in the novel - kind of a pain of a character actually as I hate reading about woman who are so needy - it frustrates me.  When the event happened, Fran could have reacted one of two ways - i.e. she could have completely broken down - or she could go deep within herself and find the strength that she would need.  She obviously decided to find the strength to get through what she, I believe, on a subconscious level knew she would eventually have to go through.

[Librarian]

        I agree with those who said different types of people will react differently in tragic situations. I don't see Fran as self-absorbed. I see her as trying to fill her role as best as she knows how. For example, in the Victimology chapter on page 23 we see....."At work she'd filled out these forms from the other side of the desk, documenting the unconscious and unidentified, translating the painful and life-changing into the bloodless acronyms of emergency medicine. As a professional she honored calmness above all, trusting efficiency over emotion. She didn't want to be the hysterical mother, demanding her child be seen immediately, but it felt like they were wasting time. They should be out searching for her."..........her thoughts as they fill out police forms.

Librarian

Message Edited by Librarian on 06-02-2008 08:07 PM

[Carmenere_lady]

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KxBurns wrote:

What did you think Fran, Kim's mother? How does Fran change as a result of the events of the novel? Can you pinpoint any particular moments of transformation?

Discuss Fran's strengths and weaknesses and how they are heightened or minimized by the loss of Kim.

-Karen

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I felt that Fran ran purely on adrenaline at the time she discovered that Kim was missing.  She immediately went on line to find out all there is to know about what one needs to

do to find a loved one.  Flyers, dogs, helicopters, search parties, etc.  While the detectives went into a lets get the facts mode, Fran went into action.  I respected her for that.  Pull out all the stops while there is a chance to find Kim alive. 

Then as the adrenaline subsides she turns more and more to alcohol and pills to help her cope.

She also seems to be very weary of Kim's friends especially  her boyfriend and looks at him as prime suspect #1.

I agree with some of you that Over the rainbow was a bit over the top.  It doesn't help her to find Kim it only makes her become more of a victim and a little pathetic.

[vivico1]

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Carmenere_lady wrote:
I agree with some of you that Over the rainbow was a bit over the top. It doesn't help her to find Kim it only makes her become more of a victim and a little pathetic.

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Hey guys, instead of Somewhere over the Rainbow, how about the song, Somewhere Out There, from that disney cartoon movie. I love that song lol, and at least it says, somewhere out there, beneath the pale moonlight, someone's thinking of me, and loving me tonight. Goes on to say and then we'll be together. Remember, the song about the little lost mouse that turned into a big hit? Just a thought lol. What is it with that song anyway? Was it her favorite? I dont remember. I know it makes her sister cry when she doesn't want to about the song, but I think I would too if it was that Hawaiian guys version who died. If its not her favorite, it is a kind of strange song for this. Somewhere Out There is a "Song for the Missing".

Message Edited by vivico1 on 06-02-2008 08:52 PM

[djohns64]

Fran was not a action person in the search for Kim. She left that to Ed, he was the take action person in the search for Kim. Fran could only help by being the organizer, making flyers, organizing public announcements, doing interviews with reports and depending on her friends for help. In the beginning she

seemed to leave Ed, to do his on thing. Fran seems to be dependent on her friends, drugs and wine to get thru it .

[Jennd1]

I think Fran is a take charge type of person or she wants to be. She diligently tries everything she can think of to get Kim in the news and keep her there. I think she feels close to Kim or closer to Kim than Lindsay, but I think this whole thing is very hard on her in ways no one sees such as the significance of the butterfly pendants, both the one she buys herself and Kim's.