whiteginger wrote:April, Muse, I still hope Sam and Sarah will get together
. Doesn't Sarah say something about telling her boss about going to the conference and Sam finds out that way? I can't remember after that . . . Does Sam take vacation time to go to meet Sarah or does the Sarah's boss send/encourage him to go make sure Sarah is OK?
That's sounding about right to me. Sam was kinda vague on that wasn't he? Lol Anyway, I think Sarah is going to tell her boss he has some "splainin'!" to do when she finally decides to go back to work....if she decides to go.....eaveything's up in the air a bit here ... and poooor pooor Kate. Sick as she is, she sounds more like a drunk skunk lol. I loooove that scene in the lobby. (This would be such a good movie).
Back to Jo and Gracie . . . I loved the part where Jo says something to amuse Gracie and tries to make her laugh; her attempt is met by stony silence. Then the elevator operator, or was it the doorman(?), says the exact same thing and is rewarded with a big smile. No kids of my own, but as a teacher, I've seen this happen so many times with a kid and his new step-parent. How old is Gracie? Here, at least, she's a precocious little thing, isn't she? I remember Jessie saying that she would have taken Gracie but Rachel left specific instructions that Jo take Gracie. Then Jessie adds something about how getting Gracie is a special honor--and, of course, being trusted with someone's child is a special honor--but I also wondered if there was something else "special" about Gracie that we don't know yet.
You are right, Ginger. Kids will dead-pan you and just look at you with those big doe eyes and no re-action. You can stand on your head and blow speghetti out your nose to no avail, and the next person will say something inane and PooF, the kid rolls with the giggles. What a put-down. It's like they are telling you they aren't going to let you in. They aren't going to let you close enough to matter, to hurt them, to love them, to make any difference. It's ablock wall, and very hard to get through. But believe me, they are watching and listening to EVERYTHING you say and do. Consistancy is the big thing, consistancy.
I can hardly wait to see what Jo's definition of organization for Gracie is. Poor kid, it's not looking good. I keep hearing "corporate boardroom" in my head. Uh Oh.
Muse
Mountain_Muse wrote:
whiteginger wrote:(This would be such a good movie).
I find myself reading these posts and then starting to respond . . . only to realize I can't say very much without spoiling the story! So I'll leave it at this: It's nice to see that you're all picking up on the important "story questions."
. . . so I'll tell you a story of a different kind. Muse commented "This would be such a good movie" (Did i mention that I adore you, Muse?) It's every author's dream, to see one of her books turned into a movie. And for a brief, shining moment last year I had hesitant hopes. A film agent from LA came across my book during a New-York-City trip to a bookseller's convention. She hunted me down and offered to represent the film rights for TPCMF in Hollywood. After checking her credentials, I signed on the dotted line.
Alas, the agent never did sell the book, which really wasn't a surprise: 88,000 books are published each year; a tiny fraction of those have the rights sold to Hollywood; an even tiner fraction actually make it to production; still fewer are released.
BUT for one full year, I got a true Hollywood/L.A. experience: I received reports that the producer for The Devil Wears Prada was looking at TPCMF, that ION television was interested, that it's in the hands of one of the producers of Forest Gump . . . It got to the point that my kids would swan in, see that I'm on the phone, roll their eyes at their friends and say "oh, don't mind her, she's talking to her FILM AGENT."
For that alone, it was totally worth it!
Alas, it is Muse you adore for the movie comment . . . but ONLY because I didn't type it in the thread first. I was certainly thinking it loudly enough that perhaps you heard that. Or maybe I was channeling April. 
I do "SEE" each scene: Characters are complex; action is well paced and highlighted with humor. I am surprised that no one picked up the option.
Hey, Deb, as one of the final "questions" for the novel, what do you think about us "casting" the movie?!?
lisavergehiggins wrote:
Mountain_Muse wrote:
whiteginger wrote:(This would be such a good movie).
I find myself reading these posts and then starting to respond . . . only to realize I can't say very much without spoiling the story! So I'll leave it at this: It's nice to see that you're all picking up on the important "story questions."
. . . so I'll tell you a story of a different kind. Muse commented "This would be such a good movie" (Did i mention that I adore you, Muse?) It's every author's dream, to see one of her books turned into a movie. And for a brief, shining moment last year I had hesitant hopes. A film agent from LA came across my book during a New-York-City trip to a bookseller's convention. She hunted me down and offered to represent the film rights for TPCMF in Hollywood. After checking her credentials, I signed on the dotted line.
Alas, the agent never did sell the book, which really wasn't a surprise: 88,000 books are published each year; a tiny fraction of those have the rights sold to Hollywood; an even tiner fraction actually make it to production; still fewer are released.
BUT for one full year, I got a true Hollywood/L.A. experience: I received reports that the producer for The Devil Wears Prada was looking at TPCMF, that ION television was interested, that it's in the hands of one of the producers of Forest Gump . . . It got to the point that my kids would swan in, see that I'm on the phone, roll their eyes at their friends and say "oh, don't mind her, she's talking to her FILM AGENT."
For that alone, it was totally worth it!
Don't give up! One of my favorite movies "Second Hand Lions" was bantered around for 10 years before it made it to the big screen and then it was a HUGE hit. Boy was it worth the wait.. I'm retired, so waiting is no problem for me.
Oh, I love this book, and I love stirring the pot to get a good discussion going. So jump on in the water's warm.Muse
whiteginger wrote:
Hey, Deb, as one of the final "questions" for the novel, what do you think about us "casting" the movie?!?
I think it's a great idea, but alas I'm old and forgetful too, so if you don't see it add it.
whiteginger wrote:
Hey, Deb, as one of the final "questions" for the novel, what do you think about us "casting" the movie?!?
Why wait? Ginger, I'm a good sport so 
back at you. Nanananana. and I still say Sam's being a pain in the butticus. Just like my old boy friend who showed up at my wedding rehersal and had the nerve to take me aside and try to talk me out of getting married. I can SEE Sam having the gall to do that. geeez. But boy does he sound like a hunk. Who do you think should play him?
Muse
Mountain_Muse wrote:
dhaupt wrote:
Mountain_Muse wrote:Okay,
I've got another question and thought....let's go back to Kate for a moment. I am going to have to admit that when I read that she decided, without discussion, consultation, or otherwise involving her significant other (husband) in the desicion process, . . . they appear to be the perfect family....remember even the sex is on a regular schedule. (what a crack up). I think I get a whiff of why our perfect mom was passed over for mommy duty. hmmmmmm
Muse
oka, I can see that.
Lol,
He paid for her to stay in that fancy hotel because he knows Sarah too well. They talked about that on the plane, I think. But he wanted her to survive and make it back home so he could throttle her when she got back. ... remember what Kate yelled at him? "I'm not your father!!!" What did that mean? I have a feeling there's something there. There has to be a reason Paul is going off the deep end about all this. There has got to be a reason "order' and consistancy is soooooo important.
Any ideas?
Muse
Wow, girls! It's late--yes, 7pm during a show run is late!-- and I've got to quit checking this . . . so here's my parting shot for the day . . . .
Kate would NOT have been the perfect mommy for Rachel's child exactly because she is the PERFECT mommy--Rachel was way too adventuresome to want someone who had sex on schedule--to quote Muse "what a crack up" --as the mother for her child. (That's also why I think that Jo's idea for "organization" will be a bust.) And, much to Lisa's credit as a writer, we readers don't really know about the conversations between Paul and Kate from the time of the last jump until the time she gets on that plane to India. I'm anticipating their next interaction/conversation. (Anticipation is a wonderful thing! I'm thinking MOVIE! )
I do not remember the "I'm not your father!" --but that's another one of those character/plot enriching details that would make this such a great movie. Lisa, I think you need to contact another agent and give your kids more to talk about!
whiteginger wrote:
Mountain_Muse wrote:
dhaupt wrote:
Mountain_Muse wrote:
Okay,
I've got another question and thought....let's go back to Kate for a moment. I am going to have to admit that when I read that she decided, without discussion, consultation, or otherwise involving her significant other (husband) in the desicion process, . . . they appear to be the perfect family....remember even the sex is on a regular schedule. (what a crack up). I think I get a whiff of why our perfect mom was passed over for mommy duty. hmmmmmm
Muse
oka, I can see that.
Lol,
He paid for her to stay in that fancy hotel because he knows Sarah too well. They talked about that on the plane, I think. But he wanted her to survive and make it back home so he could throttle her when she got back. ... remember what Kate yelled at him? "I'm not your father!!!" What did that mean? I have a feeling there's something there. There has to be a reason Paul is going off the deep end about all this. There has got to be a reason "order' and consistancy is soooooo important.
Any ideas?
Muse
Wow, girls! It's late--yes, 7pm during a show run is late!-- and I've got to quit checking this . . . so here's my parting shot for the day . . . .
Kate would NOT have been the perfect mommy for Rachel's child exactly because she is the PERFECT mommy--Rachel was way too adventuresome to want someone who had sex on schedule--to quote Muse "what a crack up"
I do not remember the "I'm not your father!" --but that's another one of those character/plot enriching details that would make this such a great movie.
I do remember the I'm not your father, she also said I'm not leaving you. I think I remember something said about his father abandoning them, but maybe I'm thinking of one of the other twenty or so novels I have running around in my head
Lisa, was there something about that earlier in the book, I promise I haven't read anything further than week one, I've learned my lesson
dhaupt wrote:The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship
Well the long wait is over let the March read begin.
Please use this as a guide to the discussion but please also add thoughts and comments that you wish to say.
Week One
The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship
1. The novel opens in the belly of a skydiving plane where Kate Jansen is supposed to jump out of.
How did you like this opening.
2. We’ve met the major players in our novel tell us what you think of each of them
Kate
Sarah
Jo
3. Jo inherits the most unlikely of gifts from Rachel, her daughter Gracie
Where you surprised that Rachel’s family gave up Gracie so quickly
4. After Jo’s trip to the hospital she decides to handle motherhood as all other things in her life with organization and planning and delegation
How well do you think that’s going to work out
5. The novel is based on deathbed requests made by the missing friend Rachel and in this first part we read the one to Kate
Seeing how Paul reacted to Kate’s solo jump and Kate’s reaction to his reaction, do you think that Rachel knew what she was doing
6. We end week one with Kate and Sarah arriving in India, the introduction of Sam, Kate’s obvious reaction to so many immunizations at once and finally ending with Coin and Sarah meeting and “reconnecting”
7. Tell us how you like the novel so far, be honest, did you stop at week one or did the author entice you to continue.
Okay, sorry, I'm a little late to the game here. Lots of work-related issues - just a reason, and hardly an excuse. But here go my two cents' worth. And I have to say that I think there are so many interesting comments posted, not sure I can add much to this week's discussion.
1. I really liked the opening. It took me a little while to get oriented, just like I suppose it took Kate a little while to get oriented.... ;-) but a more interesting way to start the story than just 'diving' into the premise. And it showed us a lot about Kate's character and her determination to honor her dead friend's wishes.
2. AND 5. Kate - my feelings have gone up and down on her. I admired her, then I felt for her and her feelings of being trapped in her life, and then I realized that I couldn't keep admiring her decisions. On this one, I definitely agree with Muse. She made a decision, early on, to get married, to have children, and to honor her marriage and her commitment to her children. One sky dive is an adventure, taking more without a discussion with her partner seems deceptive to me. And then to go to India with Sarah - let's just say it's beyond the realm of what I would consider. I know, this is all supposed to be an epiphany of sorts for her, but this puts Rachel into some kind of god-like, all-knowing position that I just don't think she had. Having lost several people, over the last two years, that I was close to made me see how their life views changed as their illnesses progressed, but I never saw anyone have that kind of vision for others in that time. NOT TO SAY that it doesn't happen, mind you, and Rachel was certainly cut out of a different cloth than my cousins and aunt, but I really have to think hard about deathbed wishes. Selfish? Kinda. Trying to change the world of other people in a way that WE think they should live. Rachel probably had some insight into the problems of others, just as we all see other people's situations a little more clearly and perhaps unbiased than they themselves do, but I'm not sure that gives anyone the right to pry into those lives. I don't think that Paul was at all out of line, and I think that if Sarah was starting to feel a bit boring or trapped after her sky dive, it merited a discussion. Not a continuing, secretive second life. Her life, and possible death, impacts so many others - she needs to watch 'It's a Wonderful Life' a few times!! 
3. Yes, I was surprised that the family gave Gracie up so quickly, and perhaps more surprised that Rachel left her to Jo. Maybe it was the best decision for Gracie, to be raised by someone in good health with adequate resources, but maybe a better decision would have been for Gracie to stay with her own family and request Jo's financial support, along with some 'big sister' time. Honestly, I would never have left my kids to someone outside my family in that situation, especially without talking to them first. But I think that Rachel was very much caught up in her adventure life, and she had a different take on things. Is it apparent that I'm not overfond of Rachel??!! I'm holding out on my final judgment until the end, but right now I think she was a bit reckless. Then again, I may be the most boring person I know.......
4. Oh, I think that in the end Jo and Gracie will make a good team, with a few hard knocks along the way, and both will grow in some unexpected ways, to them.
6. Like most others here, I think that Sam is the ultimate winner for Sarah's heart. Colin is a fantasy, a dream of how things were, and after all that time apart, how could he be going in the same direction as Sarah? Sam is steady, he winds up being there for Sarah, and I think that his care and concern for her is evident. I guess time will tell.
7. Ah - another book that I wasn't so sure about, but frankly I'm really enjoying it! I read the first 6 chapters a few weeks ago and had to read 3 or 4 books in the meantime to keep from reading ahead! This has a feel of 'chick lit' to me, which is not a genre that I would normally select, but I think that I'll give it another look. Thanks Lisa! Maybe we're all learning something via Rachel.
elaine_hf wrote:
2. AND 5. Kate - my feelings have gone up and down on her. I admired her, then I felt for her and her feelings of being trapped in her life, and then I realized that I couldn't keep admiring her decisions. On this one, I definitely agree with Muse. She made a decision, early on, to get married, to have children, and to honor her marriage and her commitment to her children. One sky dive is an adventure, taking more without a discussion with her partner seems deceptive to me. And then to go to India with Sarah - let's just say it's beyond the realm of what I would consider. I know, this is all supposed to be an epiphany of sorts for her, but this puts Rachel into some kind of god-like, all-knowing position that I just don't think she had. . . .
Elaine and Muse, I agree with you about Kate . . . and I don't agree with you. I agree that I would have felt (I'm 99.9% sure) compelled to tell my husband about the skydiving, maybe before beginning the lessons, but certainly after the first jump.
BUT, on the other hand, I think Kate honestly thought Paul would be excited for her (after a moment of initial shock, perhaps) that she had done this on her own.
And during their argument, doesn't Paul tell Kate she needs to talk with Sarah? Yes, I know he is thinking that seeing the poverty in which Sarah works will bring Kate back to her senses about what a good life she has as the perfect mom, but he does tell Kate to talk/spend some time with Sarah. (I don't think I dreamed that, did I?)
And we, readers, really don't know much, if anything, about the conversations between Paul and Kate between the time Kate parachutes down to meet him and her leaving for India with Sarah. We know Paul arranged a good hotel for them, so evidently Paul and Kate are trying to work this out. I'm thinking we'll get more info on this later.
My first reaction to TPCMF (and to JB) was a dislike, distrust, of the god-like--I'm borrowing your totally apt descriptor, Elaine--orchestrater of the events. But, Rachel is such a romantic figure (literary sense) that I have already forgiven her god-complex, replacing my distrust with fascination for his mysterious woman who could attract such a diverse, interesting group of women/friends (all over the world?) and leave a daughter for someone else to rear, even while she was alive.
Even if I'm on the fence about this one, I loved this line, Elaine: Her life, and possible death, impacts so many others - she needs to watch 'It's a Wonderful Life' a few times!!
I do remember the I'm not your father, she also said I'm not leaving you. I think I remember something said about his father abandoning them, but maybe I'm thinking of one of the other twenty or so novels I have running around in my head
Lisa, was there something about that earlier in the book, I promise I haven't read anything further than week one, I've learned my lesson
I think at this point in the story (first seven chapters) the only mention of Paul's father is Kate's cryptic comment "I'm not your father!" (Lisa, muzzling herself now.)
Also, I mentioned this on the welcome thread but I thought I'd mention it again here:
Have you guys noticed the hats on the front cover of The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship? Well, at the end of the March I'll be giving away a bunch of those hats to you folks, as a small token of thanks for being a part of this reading group.
Anytime during the month just go to my website contact page (listed below,) enter your name and address, mention that you're a member of the forum, and I'll take it from there. On that page are lots of pictures of book-club groups from all over the U.S., sporting the hats.
http://www.lisavergehiggins.com/contact.htm
lisavergehiggins wrote:
I do remember the I'm not your father, she also said I'm not leaving you. I think I remember something said about his father abandoning them, but maybe I'm thinking of one of the other twenty or so novels I have running around in my head
Lisa, was there something about that earlier in the book, I promise I haven't read anything further than week one, I've learned my lesson
I think at this point in the story (first seven chapters) the only mention of Paul's father is Kate's cryptic comment "I'm not your father!" (Lisa, muzzling herself now.)
Also, I mentioned this on the welcome thread but I thought I'd mention it again here:
Have you guys noticed the hats on the front cover of The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship? Well, at the end of the March I'll be giving away a bunch of those hats to you folks, as a small token of thanks for being a part of this reading group.
Anytime during the month just go to my website contact page (listed below,) enter your name and address, mention that you're a member of the forum, and I'll take it from there. On that page are lots of pictures of book-club groups from all over the U.S., sporting the hats.
http://www.lisavergehiggins.com/contact.htm
What a generous offer thank you Lisa, oh and guys you might see a quote or two by your's truly
lisavergehiggins wrote:
I do remember the I'm not your father, she also said I'm not leaving you. I think I remember something said about his father abandoning them, but maybe I'm thinking of one of the other twenty or so novels I have running around in my head
Lisa, was there something about that earlier in the book, I promise I haven't read anything further than week one, I've learned my lesson
I think at this point in the story (first seven chapters) the only mention of Paul's father is Kate's cryptic comment "I'm not your father!" (Lisa, muzzling herself now.)
Also, I mentioned this on the welcome thread but I thought I'd mention it again here:
Have you guys noticed the hats on the front cover of The Proper Care and Maintenance of Friendship? Well, at the end of the March I'll be giving away a bunch of those hats to you folks, as a small token of thanks for being a part of this reading group.
Anytime during the month just go to my website contact page (listed below,) enter your name and address, mention that you're a member of the forum, and I'll take it from there. On that page are lots of pictures of book-club groups from all over the U.S., sporting the hats.
http://www.lisavergehiggins.com/contact.htm
Lisa, I admire those hats every time I see the cover of this book!! I'm off to your website right now! And thank you for that, and for being a part of this conversation. I think we all appreciate that you probably have a couple zillion other things going on....
Elaine
elaine_hf wrote:
2. AND 5. Kate - my feelings have gone up and down on her. I admired her, then I felt for her and her feelings of being trapped in her life, and then I realized that I couldn't keep admiring her decisions. On this one, I definitely agree with Muse. She made a decision, early on, to get married, to have children, and to honor her marriage and her commitment to her children. One sky dive is an adventure, taking more without a discussion with her partner seems deceptive to me. And then to go to India with Sarah - let's just say it's beyond the realm of what I would consider. I know, this is all supposed to be an epiphany of sorts for her, but this puts Rachel into some kind of god-like, all-knowing position that I just don't think she had. Having lost several people, over the last two years, that I was close to made me see how their life views changed as their illnesses progressed, but I never saw anyone have that kind of vision for others in that time. NOT TO SAY that it doesn't happen, mind you, and Rachel was certainly cut out of a different cloth than my cousins and aunt, but I really have to think hard about deathbed wishes. Selfish? Kinda. Trying to change the world of other people in a way that WE think they should live. Rachel probably had some insight into the problems of others, just as we all see other people's situations a little more clearly and perhaps unbiased than they themselves do, but I'm not sure that gives anyone the right to pry into those lives. I don't think that Paul was at all out of line, and I think that if Sarah was starting to feel a bit boring or trapped after her sky dive, it merited a discussion. Not a continuing, secretive second life. Her life, and possible death, impacts so many others - she needs to watch 'It's a Wonderful Life' a few times!!
Elaine, what a great way to describe her. And like always it's my wonderful participants that always make me rethink possibilities of my first thoughts.
thanks
