Friendship and Popularity

[Rachel-K]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

[Zia01]

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school? Ya I do but not in Sam's crowd. Her crowd were the people I avoided. At the same time, I think my friends and I, even if we weren't the crowd that treated people like dirt, made our own judgments about people too but weren't as vocal about it as Sam's crowd is.

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him? I think Rob is a jerk. He's just like Sam. They figure out at a young age what it takes to fit in and go from there, even at the expense of treating others like dirt.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about? I don't think she does but I haven't read enough yet to form a solid opinion about this yet.

[flarglepuf]

I honestly seems to me that the worse you treat the other people in Thomas Jefferson, the more popular you become.

I can kind of see myself in Kent-very quiet, but full of personality.

Sam's friends all seem to be altering their personalities in some way to fit in with each other and to become popular.  They also all seem to have a skeleton in their closet that they are trying to hide and forget.  They do seem to care about each other, dispite the way they treat the other people at their school.

Sam doesn't see any difference between being popular and being cared about.  She feels that because she's popular, everyone should be in love with her.

[bookrooted]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson? I know one way was how many roses you recieved on cupid day, but regularly i also think it might be how mean and dominant you are, or your friends.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school? I feel like i could relate to Kent the most as well. How determined and helpful he is, and how he cared less about what people thought of him.

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him? No, Rob is not as wonderful as Sam thinks of him. I think she always told herself he was somebody different, somebody who cared, when he was just a lazy bum. What makes him popular i think is that he is on the lacrosse team, is going out with Sam, and that he doesn't care about others feelings, and isn't afraid to put others down. I think Sam thought of him as a safe harbor, because of his social status. I think over time she just thought of him as annoying and a waste of time.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about? I think Sam does see the difference. Like how when she was getting her roses, the angel girl who marveled at her rose was sort of sacred of Sam and really cautious because sam was popular. But with Kent, he always helped her out and tried to always make her feel better, even after all the things she did.

[momofprecious1]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson? Making fun of the quiet, shy &  unpopular students. This is really common in all high schools not only Thomas Jefferson.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school? Reading this book really reminded me that not much has changed since I was in high school. I was definitely not in the crowd like Sam & sometimes I wished I was just because I wanted to be popular  & have a lot of friends but looking back now I'm so happy that I wasn't so shallow. I was one of the quiet shy girls who had a good head on my shoulders. I wasn't the least popular person but I wasn't the one to be invited to all the parties either. I may not have had many friends but I am also happy to say that my best friend & I have been friends for 31 years (since we were in 1st grade). I would say that I see myself the most in Kent.

[DSaff]

Popularity hasn't seemed to change since my days in high school, at least as it relates to our story. It is based on who you know, who you date, what year you are in, and what activities you participate in. Now, that isn't always bad. Some popular students are great role models, but we don't find that here. These kids are mean and demeaning to others, and I didn't like them at all as the first chapter ended. It brought back memories of the same type of girls and boys in my classes. With my father in the Navy, and having attended three other high schools, my last two years of high school were ones of catch up. I never quite fit in, although I tried. While they weren't "mean," there was definitely the top group and then everyone else. Popularity definitely has its priviledges, but it also has its downfalls.

Sam's friends were a mixed bunch. I think the girls genuinely cared for each other. But they were also united against those who were different. That made them hateful and mean. Something many of us have no tolerance for. They were also reckless - drinking, smoking, no seatbelts, etc. I didn't like them at the end of chapter 1, but started feeling for Sam and her friends at the end of chapter 2. I don't think Rob is the guy Sam thinks he is, but I would love to be proven wrong. Sam thinks she is feeling love, but is Rob? His priorities seem to be drinking and sex. Not good. On the other hand, Kent seems to have a good heart and seems to care about Sam. I hope he fits more into her life as the story progresses. Sam needs to realize that popularity does not lead you to love. Popularity is as fleeting as steam, but love remains.

[kpatton]

I would have recognized myself as one of the unpopular but not nerdy or brainy.  My best friend was one of the popular girls so that really made a difference.  I hope I was never as cruel to others as Sam and her friends were, but I would guess that at times we all fall into making ourselves feel and appear better by making someone else look worse.

I would say that her friends do care about one another,  even though at the beginning these friendships appear shallow.  I do believe they would be there for each other.

I think Sam is already beginning to wonder about Rob and whether or not she likes him as much as she thought she did.  In high school we are trying out so many different aspects of ourselves trying to determine who we will eventually be.  It is a time to experiment with relationships as well as love.

I really think this last question is great.  I have only read these first two chapters, but I think Sam does know that there is a difference between being cared for and being popular.  Her friend Kent is not popular but I do believe she cares for him.

---

Rachel-K wrote:

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

---

[Facepalm]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

 As far as I can tell, its just a common high school order. You put other people down and you rise up.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

 Well... I'm not saying I'm nothing like Juliet Sykes.

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

 They're all just sterotypical teenage in-crowd girls. They're interested in parties and boys and staying on top. They don't really seem to care for each other all that much, and they aren't so considerate of each other's feelings.

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

 Of course he isn't! After dating for two months, he's already pressuring her. She even admits that she might not love him for who he is anymore, but who she thoguht he was and his popularity. I don't know for sure why he's popular, but my guess would be looks, and that he probably plays a sport.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

No.

[CajunBookLady]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

-yep...I was kinda an in the middle not really noticed type of gal.

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

 -Well I gotta tell you I did not love them. They reminded me of so many girls that I went to school with (but I guess that's the point) Sure they show that they care for each other, but only each other)

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

-I wouldn't say he's wonderful but he is the perfect high school boy...the one everybody wanted. I think through out the book her feelings change.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

-I think that eventually she does. It takes a whole lot of eye opening experiences to really get it though.

[Clyo]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

Like in very high schools – unfortunately-,  the more you treat worse and make fun of the other people (freaks, or anyone who is unpopular) the more popular you become. To be popular it’s also important to have popular friends and how many roses you receive on Cupid’s day... In my opinion, there are stupid things.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

Not myself, but Sam's friends reminded me all these stupid and evil girls I see each day at highschool.

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

They look like they haven't got personality: they do what they have to, just to become popular, no matter what. It seems like they have so many secrets that anybody should know.

Yeah, they do (maybe because if they haven't got each other, they would be alone - they are awful with the others students).

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

No, he isn't. I think Rob's a dork. He's popular because he is hot and plays in the lacrosse team; actually it isn't love - Rob is popular and Sam can be safe and popular with him, that's all.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

I don't think so. She thinks that everyone have to love her just because she is popular, no matter all she did.

[thewanderingjew]

---

Rachel-K wrote:

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

It seemed to me that what made people popular at TJ, was the ability to influence others and get away with it, regardless of whether or not it was a positive or negative influence. The popular kids were not necessarily the good students, but rather the good athletes or the "beautiful" people. They pushed the envelope with sex and drinking and breaking the rules. They knew the ins and outs of getting away with everything.

When I think about it, isn't that what makes people popular today? It doesn't matter whether they are doing good or bad things. Look at Tiger Woods, for instance. We worship our athletes and entertainers, regardless of their abominable behavior. How about Michael Vicks, Anna Nicole Smith? 

So many people love Michael Jackson yet he has a very colorful past. Many of the most popular singing groups use language and behavior that should shock us and lead us to ostracize them, but instead, we embrace them. Teens forgive their fallen heroes but not their contemporaries who don't measure up. They are fodder for ridicule instead.
Maybe the focus needs to change. Maybe young adults need to rethink their values or maybe their parents need to rethink theirs. Maybe the schools need to go back to teaching "respecting the rights of others" which no longer seems to appear on report cards in the public schools.

How does the teenage worship of those above people compare to the worship of Stephen Hawking? I bet many teens don't even know who he is. How do these people influence teenager's behavior? Do you think Hawking influences them more or Michael Jackson?
Something is rotten in the state of Denmark that needs to be cleaned out, methinks. Does anyone agree?

[luna12TK]

I think confidence is what makes people popular at Jefferson High School.  When you look closely at the different types of characters the bold confidence is what sets Sam and her friends apart from everyone else.  Also, the wya they dress doesn't hurt their popularity!

I don't really see myself in any of the characters.  I was a nobody in highschool who prefered not to be noticed. 

I think that Lindsay is a scared girl from a broken home that tries to lash out at other people so that no one will look closely at her.  Ally is a rich girl (also, from a broken family) who has been taught in life that money and status are important to sucess.  I think these girls do ultimately care about each other.  They  may not show much care for other people but they do protect each other.  Just like any other circle of friends I think they do care about each other eventhough they may come off as self-centered.

I think Rob is a horrible jerk!  He's popular because he is good looking and a jock.  His popularity has nothing to do with he "nice" personality!  Sam is with Rob because he is the one boy she had always wanted and never thought she would be able to have.  To her it was a dream come true even if he didn't always treat her the way she thought he should. 

In the very beging of the book I don't think Sam's eyes are open enough to "see" the difference. To her being popular is what's important in high school.  She doesn't realize that it doesn't mean the other people care about her.

[SpunkiiReader]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson? Being mean so that others feel threatened so they are to scared to stand up to you, puts you on top.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school? I wasnt anything like Sam and her friends. I wasnt at the top but I did look down on a few others although I wasnt vocal about it. I was a mix between Juliet and Kent, I was kinda a loner and didnt care what other thought about me.

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other? I think to an extent they care about eachother but more for themselves. like Ally and Elody only hage out with Lindsey to be popular. and Sam only hangs out with them so shes not the one they are making fun of. but they do care enough not to step on eachother to rise even higher

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him? Sam only thinks shes in love with Rob because she had a crush on him for so long and that she doesnt have anything to compare him to, no past boyfriends. She thinks her long desire for him magicly turned into love when he asked her out.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about? no. she thinks being at the top means all those who are beneath you adore you rather than despise you for what you did to get to the top

[krb2g]

It seems to me that in high school, at least for me, there was a whole other class of people that this book doesn't include. I wasn't one of the popular kids, but I had a strong group of friends (people with whom I'm still in touch today, actually). Although there were some kids (you could probably count them on one hand) to whom most people were mean, I never got the sense that people were really cutting or cruel. There were definitely social groups, but they tended to form around activities. While I've heard of social hierarchies in high school, the way people organized themselves in this book does not reflect my experience of high school.

[lg4154]

It seems that the more roses you get, the more popular you are at the school. Also, by harassing and putting ppl down, the nastier they are the more popular they become. My own personality would be more like Kent's character, a little guarded and seems to generally care about people. I think that Sams friends seem to care for her, but secretly want to out-do-her. They already make her feel like a child since she is still a virgin and like to tease her about it instead of supporting her decision in not doing it. The almost bully her into becoming more like themselves. I think Rob is not a nice person and he is only popular for his being on the LaCrosse team. I think Sam is confused on her feeling for him and almost seems clingy with him, like she is supposed to be in love and trying to convince herself at the same time that he is the one, deep down I think she knows she is just settling.

[ambika22]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

Appart for the cupid day thing, the more roses the better, i think that people that treat the loner, different and shy people the worse way are the more popular.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

I absolutely wouldnt fit on Sam's group, i was one of the persons they laugh at. I always spend many time at the library, liked to read alone in benchs and under the trees during the recess... I had a group of friends, but we are were like that.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

In the first two chapters i think Sam doesnt get the difference between those things. I think its like the more known she is, the better, doesnt matter if its for doing good or bad things. She doesnt care if they really like her or not, she only thinks about being popular .

[tennisgirl3194]

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school? Unfortunately, I see people in my school every day that are like Sam and her friends. The one good thing about it is that I'm not one of them. I'm more like Kent and his friends. I don't let others define who I am.

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

No, he's not at all! He pretty much ignores her unless he wants something from her and doesn't go out of his way to make her happy. Sam begins to be unsure about why she liked him in the first place.

[lau05]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson?

 I think you become popular at this high school if you have the right friendships and do things the rest of the people wouldn’t or couldn’t do.

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

Partly yes, partly not. I will explain it. Partly I recognize myself in Juliet because I had a period when people was very cruel and me, very naïve. Then, I wised up and I tried to go unnoticed.

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

 Sam’s friends are sometimes selfish but they get always upset each other. For example, normally Lindsay is the leader and it’s done what she says. This last day, she tells that they will do what Sam wants (it’s her special day). Really, I think a good unselfish friendship. The selfish side, we can see it when Sam goes out of the Kent’s house looking for Juliet as it is raining. There, Sam’s friends go away from the party in the Lindsay’s truck without Sam.

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

Rob isn’t as wonderful and adorable as Sam thought he was since she fell in love of him. She fell in love of his appearance but really she never got to know him. He’s popular because he plays in lacrosse team and mix himself with popular people, besides he’s handsome. Sam express, in the beginning, she’s happy cause she achieved to be her girlfriend after so much time. She is proud of his boyfriend when all the girls feel envy of her. I think she loves him her way. They were together enough time that she get used to him and thought she loved him. She realized when she relived the same day and checked his boyfriend was unfaithful with another girl and only loved her to have sex.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

I don’t see any difference. Why? Easy. When you’re popular you’re upset every day with the fear to losing it. When you’re not popular, you think constantly how get to be it, how avoid be the objective of people and so on.

[kpatton]

As I've been reading posts I wanted to make an observation.  I don't think people at Thomas Jefferson High were popular because they teased and put down others.  It was becasue they were already popular that allowed them to get by with this kind of behavior.

Kathy

[Lovez-to-Read]

What makes people popular at Thomas Jefferson? 

Well on Cupid day, getting roses. On a regular basis, going to parties, which include drinking, and doing whatever seems crazy. 

Do you recognize yourself in any of Sam's descriptions of her friends or of the other kids in her high school?

Well...I used to be in a group like the one Sam is in. I was in exactly the same place she was, I was new to everything, I hadn’t always been like that until they picked me, and I went along with everything just to fit in. I'm in a gruop that is like it but less....crazy. i used to be the one making fun of the 'weird' people. Bit I'm not the one getting made fun of either

How would you describe each of Sam's friends? Do they show that they care for each other?

 They do care for each other and they would usually have each other’s backs but not always. If one of them did something bad then it could be that they walk away.

Is Rob as wonderful as Sam thinks he is? What makes him popular? How does Sam describe her feelings for him?

 Rob is a...he is not wonderful, at all! Well she is the one who makes him popular and since he is supposed to be cute. She is like in love with him.

Does Sam see any difference between being popular and being cared about?

At first she says that being popular means people care. But in the end she knows better and sees the difference.