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You wake up in Unknown Kadath.
I am on a boat. I am still on a boat. Every morning I wake up and I see nothing because I have no eyes. I don't need to see. The waves tell me enough. Not there yet. A sailor blasphemes crudely, and the others laugh. If only they knew. If only they had seen what I have seen. I have no eyes but I must scream. I am Jack's undulating tentacle.
You wake up at R'lyeh.
The bottom of the ocean is spread out before me. The non-euclidian geometry of the structures fills me with an existential angst like paint stripper. The tentacles in my eye-sockets quiver in anticipation. Daddy, I'm home. In his house at R'lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming. Before me looms the tomb of a star vampire, having lain dormant here for aeons. It is awake now. They are all awake now. I take a step forwards. My mind takes a step back. Slide. The dreamer dreams no longer. I use my tentacles to pry open the vault and step inside. The star vampire assaults my psyche with a barrage of ethereal screams.
"I want you to punch me as hard as you can."
"EEAAAAEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIGHHHHUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
When the stars are right, I cock back my fist and punch him in the cloaca.
"EEUUUUUGHHHowwwwmmmmm..."
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everything drops to zero.
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