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IBIS
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Registered: ‎11-22-2006
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Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

This is my absolute favourite Sherlock Holmes joke.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fall asleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes him up.
 
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson ponders for a minute. "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Timewise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?'"

Holmes is silent for a moment, then speaks. "Watson, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent."
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THere are lots of jokes based on Holmes' "Elementary, my dear Watson."

Watson: What kind of tree is that Holmes?

Holmes: A lemon tree, my dear Watson.

Mrs Hudson painted the hall just inside the front door of 221b a bright yellow.
Watson walked in and said, "What have we here Holmes?"
Holmes replied, "A lemon entry, my dear Watson".

Please share your favorites.

IBIS

 

 

IBIS

"I am a part of everything that I have read."
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becke_davis
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

Oh, I LOVE the first one!
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Everyman
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

One day, Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson were doing their usual investigative business, when they uncovered an unusual painting.

At first glance, it looked like a picture of normal oak tree, in the middle of a wilderness, but if one looked closer, one could see that it was a remarkable painting. The tree trunk was actually made of fire, and its branches were made of ice, clouds and earth.

"What is it, Holmes?" asked Watson in awe.

"It's an Element tree, my dear Watson," replied Holmes.
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I think, therefore I drive people nuts.
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becke_davis
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

I'm still groaning.  I found a website with several of these incredibly corny jokes:
 
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Nadine
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

Apparently the Russians love Sherlock Holmes. Here is a Russian spoof on SH in Russian with English subtitles. It is in two parts.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HULUEK0PkbU&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2emcWHVULE
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becke_davis
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

Hi from the Windy City! I was just thinking, this would also be a good thread to post Sherlock Holmes funny trivia, too -- it looks like you've already made a start on it.

When I get back home I'll post some links but I'm sure some of you Holmes buffs already know of some interesting sites.
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Nadine
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes


becke_davis wrote:
Hi from the Windy City! I was just thinking, this would also be a good thread to post Sherlock Holmes funny trivia, too -- it looks like you've already made a start on it.

When I get back home I'll post some links but I'm sure some of you Holmes buffs already know of some interesting sites.



Remember there is at least one newbie here!

Are there any others out there in the void that would like to raise their hand at least or am I the only one left in the world who is reading Sherlock Holmes for the first time?
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becke_davis
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

Nadine -- I'm sure you are not alone. I haven't read Holmes for years -- I read the complete works back in ancient times when I was in high school and I read them again in my thirties but that was also a long time ago. So even though I remember the stories, they are not exactly fresh in my mind. I'm looking forward to rereading them with the perspective of my rapidly advancing years!
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slatkasrca
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

SHERLOCK HOLMES AND DR. WATSON IN A HOT-AIR BALLOON

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are taking a trip across a desert by hot-air balloon. There are not many landmarks; so eventually, they become lost. Luckily, while flying quite low, they see a man.

Holmes shouts, "Sir, could you please tell me where we are?"

The man looks up, ponders for a moment, and then answers, "Gentlemen, you are in a hot-air balloon!"

At this moment, a burst of wind picks up the balloon and carries it away.

Holmes turns to Watson and asks: "My friend, do you know who that man is?"

"No, Holmes, of course not!"

"He's a mathematician!"

"Holmes, that's incredible! But *how* do you know?"

"It's very simple, Watson. First of all, the man thought before giving us an answer. Secondly, his answer was absolutely correct. And thirdly, the answer he gave us was of no practical use, whatsoever!"
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becke_davis
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

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pjmanley41
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

I love this thread (my family doesn't! LOL)
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CousinMary
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

Oh these are just great!  More, more!
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slatkasrca
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Re: Sherlock Holmes: Jokes

I haven't read all of them either, but I listened to all the stories. So no you're not alone:smileyhappy: