Nook board etiquette... Where is it? [ Edited ]

[avid_reader1590]

I agreed with Sir_Vikin as there are a few posters that are just plain bullies. I have been reading and commenting  for quite some time and used to feel very comfortable here. Not so much anymore.  It seems, especially lately there has been some very nasty unnecessary comments made only to make others feel bad.

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Sir_Vikin wrote:

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shilohMD wrote:

I beg to differ...I did read and comprehend what you wrote.  You were lamenting the lack of civility on this Board.  And then proceeded to paint the Board with a brush that colors "some of the members" with being rude and arrogant.  Then you step back and volley with those who take exception to your inappropriate generalizations...sounds like you just came here to stir up a fight...that is definitely troll-esque

Have you read some of the true trolls that post here?  I believe we waste too much time feeding them. The patience of some who try to help them (until they realize that their audience has posted once and gone away) is amazing.  I reiterate that these "one-post drive-bys" don't deserve courtesy...and if they get torched, it's payback to the aforementioned patient and helpful ones.

I also reiterate that an overwhelming number of the members of this Board are helpful, polite, and go out of there way.  And considerably better-behaved that other Internet Boards.  Your comments about this being generally not a fun place to visit because new posters get trashed is nonsense.

If you are willing to contribute and help those in need of assistance, I urge you to do so.  If you are conserving your posts only to come here and trash the people who do find it an interesting place to visit, that's really a shame.  The fact that you are a long-time member and an infrequent poster puzzles me...join in and contribute!  Surely you have something positive to offer us.

Or not...

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@ShilohMD  Alas, your comments have once again done a better job of illustrating my point than I am able to.  The problem stems from the attitude that it is acceptable to show a lack of courtesy to those who are deemed to be "drive-by posters" or trolls before it is even known whether or not they are in fact trolls or "drive-by posters".  Follow this with the attitude of "if they get torched, its payback.." and I have to shake my head in disbelief.  

I have to ask, did you read what you wrote before you posted it? Regardless, please by all means continue to post as you are doing a much better job of validating my point than I am by responding to you. 

It is obvious that the only thing that we can agree on, is that we will continue to disagree.  That said, I will continue to contribute when I have something to say, if that paints me as a troll then so be it. 

Remember; a lack of civility begets a lack of civility.

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[shilohMD]

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Sir_Vikin wrote:

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shilohMD wrote:

I beg to differ...I did read and comprehend what you wrote.  You were lamenting the lack of civility on this Board.  And then proceeded to paint the Board with a brush that colors "some of the members" with being rude and arrogant.  Then you step back and volley with those who take exception to your inappropriate generalizations...sounds like you just came here to stir up a fight...that is definitely troll-esque

Have you read some of the true trolls that post here?  I believe we waste too much time feeding them. The patience of some who try to help them (until they realize that their audience has posted once and gone away) is amazing.  I reiterate that these "one-post drive-bys" don't deserve courtesy...and if they get torched, it's payback to the aforementioned patient and helpful ones.

I also reiterate that an overwhelming number of the members of this Board are helpful, polite, and go out of there way.  And considerably better-behaved that other Internet Boards.  Your comments about this being generally not a fun place to visit because new posters get trashed is nonsense.

If you are willing to contribute and help those in need of assistance, I urge you to do so.  If you are conserving your posts only to come here and trash the people who do find it an interesting place to visit, that's really a shame.  The fact that you are a long-time member and an infrequent poster puzzles me...join in and contribute!  Surely you have something positive to offer us.

Or not...

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@ShilohMD  Alas, your comments have once again done a better job of illustrating my point than I am able to.  The problem stems from the attitude that it is acceptable to show a lack of courtesy to those who are deemed to be "drive-by posters" or trolls before it is even known whether or not they are in fact trolls or "drive-by posters".  Follow this with the attitude of "if they get torched, its payback.." and I have to shake my head in disbelief.  

I have to ask, did you read what you wrote before you posted it? Regardless, please by all means continue to post as you are doing a much better job of validating my point than I am by responding to you. 

It is obvious that the only thing that we can agree on, is that we will continue to disagree.  That said, I will continue to contribute when I have something to say, if that paints me as a troll then so be it. 

Remember; a lack of civility begets a lack of civility.

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I am trying to be civil...you can't seem to grasp that there are some people who do not want to be helped...and trying to do so is a waste of time.  If you can't see that, then it is you who does not read and does not understand

And there are others who just post so they can marvel about the utter superiority of their own opinion, and refuse to see what's obvious.

I welcome your contributions.  I look forward to having another dedicated, interested, and sharing poster. Don't be a stranger...if you care to add some value to the Board.

[Sir_Vikin]

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shilohMD wrote:

I am trying to be civil...you can't seem to grasp that there are some people who do not want to be helped...and trying to do so is a waste of time.  If you can't see that, then it is you who does not read and does not understand

And there are others who just post so they can marvel about the utter superiority of their own opinion, and refuse to see what's obvious.

I welcome your contributions.  I look forward to having another dedicated, interested, and sharing poster. Don't be a stranger...if you care to add some value to the Board.

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Shiloh, you misunderstood the civility comment.  It was not aimed at you, it was a general thought about what to expect when we expect so little of ourselves.  I do understand and agree that some people do not want to be helped, I am not saying that we should forcibly help anyone who does not want help.  What I am saying however, is that we can act like civilized people on the boards and not respond with the knee jerk reaction of flaming people for no other reason than that we can.  Not everybody is a drive-by poster, not everybody is a troll, we need to stop treating most everyone that visits as if they fall into one category or the other.  These terms are over used and thrown around too flagrantly in my opinion. 

I am all for a spirited conversation, debate, and even argument when done respectfully.  However, I do not appreciate abusive behavior towards others that do not realize how these boards operate.  We were all "noobs" at one point in time, it really would not hurt if we stepped back and realized that we are not so very different than many of the newer posters here. 

[AndyfromVA]

@Sir Vilkin

How should one react to a post that's entitled something like "Nooks Suck" where the poster rants about how he just bought a Nook and hates it for various reasons, most of which indicate that the poster never even read the manual.  Then the poster concludes with the statement that he's returning his Nook and buying a Kindle.  There are quite a few posts like that.

Sorry, but such a poster doesn't deserve to be taken seriously or treated gently.

[Sir_Vikin]

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AndyfromVA wrote:

@Sir Vilkin

How should one react to a post that's entitled something like "Nooks Suck" where the poster rants about how he just bought a Nook and hates it for various reasons, most of which indicate that the poster never even read the manual.  Then the poster concludes with the statement that he's returning his Nook and buying a Kindle.  There are quite a few posts like that.

Sorry, but such a poster doesn't deserve to be taken seriously or treated gently.

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Andy, being as it is a public board run by B&N I would say that it should be left alone, just my opinion. I am willing to bet that if somebody took the time to make a post like that saying they were returning their nook for a kindle, then they are probably not going to sit around visiting the boards afterwards.  So why waste your time in responding to it?  Personally I ignore most of those posts. Why?  Because by responding to them all we are doing is showing how immature we can be.   That and any potentially new posters coming to the boards may see that and come away with the opinion that these boards are not friendly.  

I understand that we are all passionate about our Nooks, but lets not let our passion turn us into an unthinking mob of raging lunatics because somebody says something negative about them.  

[nannyto1]

I've been coming to the boards for about a month now. I know I have and probably will again asked questions that have been asked before. I can only speak from my experience but so far I've been treated with respect and someone is always willing to help and I really appreciate that...

[Po1gara]

I've been frequenting these boards since before the first nooks shipped and I too have seen  quite a bit of what Sir_Vikin is talking about. I've seen a lot of humor (one of the reasons I still come to the boards), and a lot of helpful suggestions. I've also become an infrequent poster  because at times I feel that my posts are unwelcome. Though no one has been particularly mean or nasty to me, except for a very few 'old' timers, no one generally replies to my posts or even acknowledges my input..so I just try to help out newbies when I can.

I do understand all of your points of view about repetitious posts, non-use of the search feature, etc. However, I have to agree that a little less nastiness  would be nice.

[avid_reader1590]

I see that Sir_Vikin has received 14 laurels so far for the original post so I guess there are many who agree with him. Kudos to all who come here to share information leaving egos and rudeness behind.

[Josienjoe]

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Sir_Vikin wrote:

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AndyfromVA wrote:

@Sir Vilkin

How should one react to a post that's entitled something like "Nooks Suck" where the poster rants about how he just bought a Nook and hates it for various reasons, most of which indicate that the poster never even read the manual.  Then the poster concludes with the statement that he's returning his Nook and buying a Kindle.  There are quite a few posts like that.

Sorry, but such a poster doesn't deserve to be taken seriously or treated gently.

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Andy, being as it is a public board run by B&N I would say that it should be left alone, just my opinion. I am willing to bet that if somebody took the time to make a post like that saying they were returning their nook for a kindle, then they are probably not going to sit around visiting the boards afterwards.  So why waste your time in responding to it?  Personally I ignore most of those posts. Why?  Because by responding to them all we are doing is showing how immature we can be.   That and any potentially new posters coming to the boards may see that and come away with the opinion that these boards are not friendly.  

I understand that we are all passionate about our Nooks, but lets not let our passion turn us into an unthinking mob of raging lunatics because somebody says something negative about them.  

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This is a public board and, for many people, appears to be the only research they do before deciding whether or not to purchase.  However, I do not agree that "by responding to them all we are doing is showing how immature we can be."  I believe that responding to an inflammatory post in kind may (may) be considered "immature," but responding with a different experience is definitely not inflammatory, just a my-experience-to-counter-your-rant posting.

I, for one (maybe in the minority), am passionate about many things, but an inanimate device is not one of them.  My nook is a very enjoyable and convenient device which allows me to take many books wherever I go, without adding weight to my luggage.  

If someone dumps on the device because they didn't research before buying, didn't RTFM, can't get their wifi connection working (so, of course, it must be the faulty device, not their settings), purchased and flew home to another country and rant that B&N sucks because the nook doesn't "work" overseas, isn't happy with the price of ebooks, doesn't want to have a default credit card on file, and so on and so on, in my opinion, it requires a response (not necessarily a nasty one, but we are all individuals and have our own passions and reactions to an inflammatory post).

[gnkc]

There was a three PAGE thread recently having to do with people posting to an old(er) thread which for the most part pretty much sums up the OP's post.

[Sir_Vikin]

@Josienjoe - I realized to late that I left out the "in kind" in my post, unfortunately it was well after the timer for editing so I could not go back and edit it.  It should have read like this:  "Because by responding to them in kind all we are doing is showing how immature we can be."  I didn't mean that nobody should not respond at all, just that responding to a flaming post with a flaming reply does nothing but show our immaturity. 

[geatdanemomDT]

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avid_reader1590 wrote:

I see that Sir_Vikin has received 14 laurels so far for the original post so I guess there are many who agree with him. Kudos to all who come here to share information leaving egos and rudeness behind.

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I've been frequenting these boards since before the first nooks shipped and I too have seen  quite a bit of what Sir_Vikin is talking about. I've seen a lot of humor (one of the reasons I still come to the boards), and a lot of helpful suggestions. I've also become an infrequent poster  because at times I feel that my posts are unwelcome. Though no one has been particularly mean or nasty to me, except for a very few 'old' timers, no one generally replies to my posts or even acknowledges my input..so I just try to help out newbies when I can.

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  Have to agree with the opinions posted in this thread. In my opinion a subject that needs to be addressed.   

[ABthree]

@Po1gara

One valuable result of a discussion like this is that it lets you learn unfamiliar things about a familiar person.  I had noted that you were posting less frequently; I figured that you had become bored with the boards, or that real life had intervened. 

It never occurred to me that the reason could be that you thought your posts were unwelcome, as judged by the number of replies.

Your posts tend to be brief (as "brevity" is measured here!), clear and cogent.  You don't ask a lot of questions, and you express your thoughts completely and concisely, without the need for clarification or amplification.  In other words, you don't leave a lot of "hooks" that someone else can use to riff on.  I generally nod and think, "that's right" when I read your posts, but "I agree!" would make a pretty lame post, and that's usually about all I could add.

Some writing can't be answered because it's so bad; other writing seldom requires an answer because it's good.  The second is a virtue, not a fault, and it shouldn't keep you from posting. 

[RSC_Nook]

OK, I know what the overall theme and purpose of this thread was, but since the title is Nook Board etiquette I am going to perhaps add another 'ask' if you will around etiquette

If you are going to come on here and post something about how your nook can't connect, or how your device has a crack in it, or can't get it to update (or whatever) but are pretty vague about the details, then after 5-8 people post trying to help PLEASE have the decency to come back and say if what they suggested worked, did you get the problem solved, OR in MOST cases come back and answer the questions they asked you.

Sorry, but it is my pet peeve when someone comes on here, says they can't get XYZ to work, are pretty light on the details, yet folks take time to respond, ask the OP questions, and they never return to answer.

If you are going to initiaite a conversation then I think it is proper etiquette to come back and respond to that conversation. 

I know we are all busy, I know not everyone sits around monitoring every post on a nook board, but at least within 2-3 days come back and either answer the questions, tell the board you got it fixed, or say you didn't and are moving on.

again, I am filing this under etiquette as well.  I guess I use boards like this a lot and personally if I DID ask for help I can't imagine not coming back and either answering follow up questions OR thanking those that helped me.  That is good etiquette in my book as well.

[CasperAZ]

Sir_Vikin, I read your post and you bring up many good points for all posters to try and follow. 

[Josienjoe]

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Sir_Vikin wrote:

@Josienjoe - I realized to late that I left out the "in kind" in my post, unfortunately it was well after the timer for editing so I could not go back and edit it.  It should have read like this:  "Because by responding to them in kind all we are doing is showing how immature we can be."  I didn't mean that nobody should not respond at all, just that responding to a flaming post with a flaming reply does nothing but show our immaturity. 

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Amazing how the addition or omission of a couple of small words can totally change the poster's intended meaning.  Sometimes our brains think something and the message doesn't quite get to our fingers.    

[agilescout]

 Sir_Vikin, Word.

I think you have it right on this point, and I have laureled you (first time!). I have been a member of these boards since I got my Nook for my birthday almost a year ago. This is my 5th post. I tend to be a lurker, and if a board seems friendly, I will start to participate more. Your description of some poster behaviors fits my observations closely and turned me off quickly. Now I come here for the free nook book thread almost exclusively unless another thread catches my eye (like this one).

I would love to participate in civil, respectbul Nook board discussions though. That would be really awesome. I have seen people on these boards go out of their way to be civil and helpful, generally doing their part to make this an enjoyable community. Unfortunately, it can be easier and emotionally satisfying (?) to chastise, be snarky, act superior, etc. Some people have pointed out that there are plenty of boards way worse than this one on the Internet. To me, this comment may be an indication that the bar that has been set for this board is a little too low. We really shouldn't have to don our flamesuits to have an online discussion. And some of us would prefer not to.

Maybe I'll try to make an effort to post more and be part of the solution;^) But I have to say, a little moderation would go a long way. B&N can't be happy about the possibility of new Nook owners checking out these boards, getting treated poorly, and not coming back. Not good for the entire Nook experience.

Best,

Agilescout

[shadowcat80]

For the most part this community is great but, as others have said we're like a family and families sometimes disagree.  We're also human and as being human we all have flaws, to expect perfectition is impossible.  Even with that fact the majority of the boards are done very well.

[Nallia Distinguished Bibliophile]

I would hate to think that I have ever made anyone feel unwelcome here.  I do everything I can to help as many people as I can and to be mmindful of the fact that every post is attached to a real person on the other end of those network cables/radio signals.

Maybe I'm truly oblivious, because I don't see this huge issue that others see.  Maybe I'm just looking at different things than others.  I expect to see an awesome, welcoming community here and that's what I usually see.  Some obviously think there is a problem though, and I am sorry if I had any part in making anyone feel that way.

[Sir_Vikin]

@ Josienjoe

I see your point, however in my case its not an omission of the brain as it is my hands.. I have only one "good" arm/hand which makes it extremely difficult to type what I am trying to say when I have a running thought.. Almost every single one of my posts that I have ever made on these boards have been edited at least 3 times due to that..