Well friends, we've all experienced it – a really, really bad sex scene – or a gross or simply bizarre descriptive term to describe a body part or body function.
The Charlaine Harris excerpt from Dead to the World, for example, has now become legend in this forum:
"While I stood stock-still, paralyzed by conflicting waves of emotion, Eric took the soap out of my hands and lathered up his own, set the soap back in its little niche, and began to wash my arms, raising each in turn to stroke my armpit, down my side, never touching my breasts, which were practically quivering like puppies who wanted to be petted."
And recently, Lily was kind enough to share with us a term from Annette Blair's Naked Dragon where the term "man lance" is used!
So, let's start keeping track of some of the most cheesiest sex scene excerpts here – it could be a CLASSIC thread! 
Paul
3monstersmom wrote:
paulgoatallen wrote:
"...I had my very own orgasm, a moment so explosive it was like I'd been saving up for a holiday."
– Dead in the Family by Charlaine Harris (p. 35)
Her holidays must be better than mine.
HA! We must be related, 3mm – your sense of humor is perfect! It reminds me of that When Harry Met Sally line: "I'll have what she's having...."
Paul
TiggerBear wrote:
paulgoatallen wrote:
"...I had my very own orgasm, a moment so explosive it was like I'd been saving up for a holiday."
– Dead in the Family by Charlaine Harris (p. 35)
Ehh "very own" as if an orgasam could ever be anything but personal. And only one what a sucky sexual romp, much less a holiday.
Could Eric or somebody plese give that girl a multiple cascade so stong she blacks out and comes back to reality. The whole point of mind blowing is the ability not to think what-so-ever into the afterglow.
Tig:
Have you ever considered writing paranormal fantasy? Because if you haven't, please do!
Paul
paulgoatallen wrote:
TiggerBear wrote:
paulgoatallen wrote:"...I had my very own orgasm, a moment so explosive it was like I'd been saving up for a holiday."
– Dead in the Family by Charlaine Harris (p. 35)
Ehh "very own" as if an orgasam could ever be anything but personal. And only one what a sucky sexual romp, much less a holiday.
Could Eric or somebody plese give that girl a multiple cascade so stong she blacks out and comes back to reality. The whole point of mind blowing is the ability not to think what-so-ever into the afterglow.
Tig:
Have you ever considered writing paranormal fantasy? Because if you haven't, please do!
Paul
Now this is terribly embarrassing. 
(blush) One more person urging me to finish the book I've been playing with for over a year now. I'm a wretched self critic.
(shrug) If I ever do get that far, I be sure to let you know.
"My nipples waved hello at him as he pulled down the cups of my bra." – Tracking the Tempest by Nicole Peeler (page 36)
paulgoatallen wrote:
"My nipples waved hello at him as he pulled down the cups of my bra." – Tracking the Tempest by Nicole Peeler (page 36)
Well
Yep, defintiely cheesy. I wrote the following post in the Tracking the Tempest thread a while ago after I first started reading it:dalnewt wrote:I started the book yesterday and am loving it. But, I must report one or two occurrences of sappy/childish sexual allusions/references.
(Scene--When Ryo calls Jane after the sending the flowers and ticket.)
p. 17 "You," I said. "You..." I continued unsure whether to thank him or give into temptation and lick the mouthpiece.
(Continuation of phone conversation)
p.17 "Jane," he breathed, as my womb did something involving a roundoff and jazz hands.
(Scene--when Ryo wakes Jane from nap to make their dinner reservations.)
p. 36 His warm tongue found my navel, and then traced it's way north, dragging me into full awareness. My nipples waved hello at him, as he pulled down the cups of my bra.
