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Why Republicans and Democrats Can't Have Good Conversation
Liberals and conservatives tend to argue with misguided aggression, with their fingers stuck in their ears, says psychologist Jonathan Haidt. In his forthcoming book, The Righteous Mind, he offers some reasons why (see its website here).
People who identify as either liberal or as conservative are likely to think that they hold moral beliefs and the opposing side does not, Haidt says. That’s a basic disconnect which clogs conversation. One explanation for the disconnect, Haidt says, is that each side tends to register different slices of life as a “moral issues.” In turn, we can feel radically different types of passion in the same physical scenario.
In his lab—with questionnaires and set-up scenarios—Haidt has identified five moral impulses, or fives ways in which people’s moral buttons tend to be pushed. He’s found that liberals tend to have the first two of the five “buttons,” and conservatives have all five. For instance, when confronted with one issue like birth control, liberals might see it as a moral issue in terms of “harm,” and conservatives might frame it as a moral issue in terms of three buttons: “harm,” “authority,” and “purity.” This doesn’t mean that one camp is more moral than the other, but it does mean that the two sides experience a different moral landscape. When they talk to each other, they often miscommunicate because they’re not labeling the same pieces of the world as a moral matter (see Haidt’s very clear essays on this stuff here and here).
Below are the five categories Haidt’s identified, which I’m calling the “buttons” that can be pressed to make us feel moral impulses. Because Haidt is an evolutionary psychologist, he ascribes evolutionary origins to the following.
The Five Moral Impulses
1) Harm/care. We’re a species that thrives when it keeps its young around for a long time and protects them. In turn, we have developed nuanced capabilities for compassion. We are good at sensing when others (our kids, but others, too) are suffering. Cultures publicly promote the feeling of compassion in order to minimize brutality.
2) Fairness/reciprocity. We are also a species that evolved to form beneficial alliances, or to know what “fair” is for various members of a group that’s trying to stick together. In turn, we’ve developed emotions that can foster fairness, like guilt, shame, revenge, responsibility, generosity, and gratitude. All cultures have also developed abstract systems for “justice” to formalize what each group member is due to keep a group together.
3) Ingroup/loyalty. We survived as a species due to loyalty, too. We have developed emotions and thinking patterns that help us defend an ingroup (people of a similar race or political bearing or religion, etc.) and reject the outgroup. The most remarkable of these thinking patterns is prejudice: Our brains quickly size up others as “like me” or “not-like-me.” The brain takes shortcuts to grossly categorize others and assess them as friend or foe. Protecting the ingroup takes a certain personality structure, perhaps one with courage and aggression. In turn, we have developed cultural notions like loyalty and heroism on the one side, and betrayal or treason on the other.
4) Authority/respect. We also survived because we developed a sense of social hierarchy. Monkeys, bees, and other species show similar organizational patterns: These species coordinate thinking and action through a leader like an alpha male, a queen bee, or a Napoleon. In support of our fluidly functioning hierarchies, we have developed emotions like pride in leadership, awe for power, and respect for elders. Different human societies promote authority, as opposed to a leveling individuality, to varying degrees.
5) Purity/sanctity. Humans evolved into an eat-meating species relatively recently, somewhere from one to three million years ago. We learned to sort edible from inedible dead things about the time that we developed a large frontal cortex. Many say that those two developments coincided with the evolution of the unique human emotion of disgust. Disgust helps shape culture. We have developed the incest taboo, the dislike for the sight and smell of feces and vomit, and a distaste for deformity and for disease. Cultures establish systems that extend disgust to other issues about the body, often embracing racial and sexual “purity,” while rejecting category-shuffling lifestyles like gender-bending, unusual eating patterns, and atypical sexual activity.
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In his lab, Haidt has found that people who self-identify as liberal tend to care about the first two moral issues: harm and fairness. In contrast, conservatives feel more about all five issues above. So, a single issue will incite different moral feelings in each.
For instance, gay marriage is probably a moral prerogative in terms of “fairness” but a moral transgression in terms of the “authority” impulse. Afterall, to change the marriage laws, we would need to go against the authority of historical opinion. In turn, someone who invests heavily in “fairness” but not in “authority” might think the marriage laws should be changed on account of moral necessity, but someone who values “authority” more than “fairness” probably wouldn’t.
So we often speak past each other. Haidt says that we tend to stick to our feelings and are slow to admit that our opponents feel as sincerely as we do. We tend to demonize the other side and form self-righteous opposing teams. Haidt has helped to form a political group based on forming bettering communication between the two sides (see here http://www.civilpolitics.org).
In order to talk more fluidly with each other, he says, we need to react less bullishly with the fact that others don’t feel like we do. People can feel earnestly moral while (if you are impatient) looking simply contradictory or stupid to you.
You can take Haidt’s moral impulse test at this link here to see which of the five “buttons” are yours.
If you want, tell us where you land on the moral button question, and the political stance question. Does his map of miscommunication make sense to you?
Ilana Simons is a therapist, literature professor, and author of A Life of One's Own: A Guide to Better Living through the Work and Wisdom of Virginia Woolf. Visit her website here.
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While most of the tests label me as a liberal, I found one that kind of stumped me at first and one that was quite revealing, showing me a side of myself I rarely allow to come to the forefront. Those two tests made me think about myself afterwards.
Labeling in itself is quite often misleading, I think. While I score along “liberal” lines” with Harm/care and Fairness/reciprocity, I sometimes consider Authority/respect important enough to make it count, however it is not an all-consuming concept for me, therefore occasionally makes my answer ambiguous or even wrong. The same goes for Purity/sanctity.
Take questions about God, for instance. I am an atheist, and contrary to a widely spread belief that atheists have no moral code, I do. And when I am asked if I would do things that God could respect, (can’t remember the exact question) I have a dilemma. If I say “no way” I might invite the thought that I am without morals. If I answer “yes,” then I might be considered a believer. My thinking is: “Yes, I do want to do good things. The God my friends believe in seems to be a good God, and so it is their God whose respect I get (not seek, though) when I do a good deed. I don’t want to be rewarded; I just want to show my respect, since that God and I share a section of a particular moral code.”
And about authority, I am not a lawless person, but I have also witnessed how absolute belief in authority can destroy people and a country. I feel that I always have to be careful with my German background. Questioning authority is not the same as disrespect for authority, but a test does not give the true picture.
The test that stumped me and that I did not want to take at first is the one about “How much money would it take for you to do a certain thing?” I guess I usually don’t think in terms of money getting me to do anything. But once I developed a “scheme” I think I progressed in an orderly fashion. My scheme was to set the price at 10,000 for some of the things I would be willing to do for money. I figured that would, in the end, give me enough to take a trip around the world. Fair enough. I’ll eat cardboard for that.
But the best test, the one that really interests me, is the shape preference test. I had no idea how it could score my moral code. It turns out that I scored very high on the liberal side (don’t want to give away how this was measured because it might influence others) but then in another area I scored quite high on conservative leanings. It is the first time that the contrast of my upbringing vs. my present life was so openly presented to me. I fought the fight between then and now within myself without knowing that I was doing it Later I thought that this fight was similar to the one that liberals and conservatives wage all the time.
Anyway, there are two of me inside!!! One that wants equality and one that seems to say that order is more important than imagination. That second one is not my preferred self; it is the voice of my stepfather rising from his grave.
As usual you have given us something to ponder, Ilana. Thank you. I’ve only done one group of tests and the beginning of the next group, but I will work my way through some of the others in time.
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From just reading this blog, I see reasons why groups/people "can't" have agreeable discourse, and it tires me to think of all the times I've tried. From relatives to friends, to strangers. From church to state, from schools to corporations. It's all politicking. Sometimes you get through, sometimes you don't. I guess the only person who calls it a win, is the one who says it is.
This last week, all I've seen in the news is political agendas, of those smiling faces that lie through their teeth, and call themselves someone who sees what you need, and plans to fulfill those needs, while laughing to themselves, and filling their pockets with your trust. Can you even believe a wife who stands by their husbands, or supporters who stand by their politics/politician, while knowing of these lies? No, not really. It's hard to see through the fake facades.
I hate the word politics. I hate the party system. I hate labels. I didn't take this test, because I honestly don't care what the outcome would show for me. What would it prove?....unless there is something that says, "anyone can change", in the course of conversation. And who can show changes for the betterment of all, not just for the self-serving-power-hungry-greed monger? And who wants to define "betterment", if people are shuffled into a category. How did we become who we are, that which seemingly separates us so profoundly?
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I read this blog several times over, and yes I was tired of politics this week, seeing the futility of these groups, with their issues they expound upon. Head-butting, which I can't understand completely. It wears me thin.
I finally had a chance to read the links to Jonathan Haidt. I find him a very insightful psychologist. Someone who apparently gets to the points we all struggle with. At least I've had these struggles. I apply this subject to myself, even though I didn't take that test. I can see this test being given to a cross section of humanity, and discussed thoroughly, and applied where possible. It's innovative, which perhaps that in itself, hard to assimilate.
I grew up in a republican family, or at least my father was a strict republican. My mother once said, he'd vote republican, no matter who the "man" was. She wouldn't. My in-laws were republican, and that got me in trouble with my mother-in-law, when I said we were voting democrat that year. I couldn't see the difference in these political groups, I only saw what the person was saying to me. I feel naive to these topics in which Jonathan Haidt brings to the surface. I've struggled with how these two parties operate.
I see how Haidt brings in the conservative views, relating to church. Over a long period of time, I've vacillated with the codes, conduct, and morals of these points of views, of church and of state. I tend to be more liberal now, than I used to be. I've been forced to see more than one side of a lot of issues. I accept them. I have to. If I don't, I fight a battle that isn't up to me to decide who wins, and who looses. I want to see what is good for the majority, as well as the individual. And being on both sides of these points of view, I do see the differences.
When I worked in the market, I worked in two states, one union, one non union. In other words, one democrat, one republican. I lived in a state that had a religion that was dominant over mine. I learned from family and friends, religion was private and sacred for the individual, and we were able to all get along without rules entering our relationship, to break us apart. We were both able to see each others feelings in these matters.
So, change, and adjusting, is nothing new for me. I've fought for it, and I've fought against it. It is a complex and complicated issue to understand these values that Haidt describes to us. I would probably buy his book, to further understand where we all stand in this complex world. If we can't make it work, or don't want change, or see things so hard-nosed, we will never move forward in understanding each other. I think respect is the main issue that brings us to this understanding. At least, that's how I see this topic.
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I probably should throw in tolerance and patience, not two of my strong points when feeling passionate about something I believe in. Re-think, re-think, re-think....the mantra.
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