When I was a kid, I read anything I could get my hands on – adult science fiction and fantasy like Herbert’s Dune and Moorcock’s Elric, pulp adventures, horror anthologies, my father’s Popular Science magazines, my mom’s “romance” novels that she hid in her dresser – Delta of Venus by Anaïs Nin, The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCullough, Wifey by Judy Blume, Jacqueline Susann’s Once Is Not Enough, etc. I remember reading Stephen King’s short story collection Night Shift in my bedroom when I was in sixth or seventh grade and being petrified under the sheets. It was awesome…
I loved stories that not only explored the dark side of human existence but also had surprise endings or jaw-dropping plot twists. I suppose that’s why I loved watching the black-and-white episodes of The Twilight Zone while my friends just couldn’t get into it.
If I were a kid today, I would undoubtedly love David Lubar’s Weenies sequence – collections of warped and creepy tales (In the Land of the Lawn Weenies, Invasion of the Road Weenies, The Curse of the Campfire Weenies, The Battle of the Red Hot Pepper Weenies, and the recently released Attack of the Vampire Weenies) aimed at middle grade readers.
In his newest, Lubar features some stories that are decidedly Twilight Zonesque. “In One Ear” is a cautionary tale about coveting other’s belongings in which a boy becomes obsessed with a new kid’s high-tech MP3 player earbuds. But when he eventually steals them from the new kid’s locker and pops the Bodztech Three-Sixty Organic Headphones into his ears, he doesn’t realize until too late that prolonged use leads to a most gruesome death. In “The Ride of a Lifetime,” a kid named Zack gets to finally experience a lifelong dream – to ride the Titanium Tempest at Wild Action Park, “the world’s fastest, highest, and newest roller coaster.” But after finding a ticket for a special midnight ride, Zack sneaks out of his family’s motel room and literally gets the ride of his life. Lubar pokes fun at the Twilight saga in “Attack of the Vampires Weenies,” a story about a couple of Bella and Edward wannabes who hold a vampire party and unwittingly invite real bloodsuckers:
“Come sparkle with us. Have oodles of dark fun playing vampire games and making new vampire pals. There will be bloodsicles, coffin cakes, and lots of other goodies.”
“Rapt Punzel” revisits the popular German fairy tale about the long-haired maiden imprisoned in the tower with an updated story about a witch who has cable, a girl addicted to reality television, an overzealous prince – and a not exactly happily-ever-after ending. “Cooties” asks the timeless playground question – what happens to the person who gets stuck with cooties? Amateur sleuth Eugene becomes fixated with this very question and after following the path of cooties from one kid to another during playtime, he sees firsthand what happens to the unfortunate one who gets stuck with the imaginary body louse when the bell rings – and trust me, you do not want cooties.
“Ghost in the Well” was arguably my favorite story of the 33 included within Attack of the Vampire Weenies. This one, reminiscent of an early Stephen King tale, revolves around a girl who falls into an old well by a crabapple tree after following a ghostly voice whispering her name.
I was a big David Lubar fan long before discovering his Weenies compilations – I absolutely loved his Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie series – but these short story collections really showcase his delightfully twisted imagination. For me, reading Attack of the Vampire Weenies was like watching a bunch of Twilight Zone episodes for kids. Don’t believe me? Just read the first story in this collection, “Not Another Word,” about a nightmarish mime – it’s exactly like a classic Twilight Zone episode, right down to the twist ending. I can almost hear the opening theme music and introduction…
You're traveling through another dimension – a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind; a journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination…
There is no doubt about it – David Lubar is the Rod Serling of Middle Grade Fiction.
…That's a signpost up ahead. Your next stop: the Weenie Zone!
Paul Goat Allen has been a full-time book reviewer specializing in genre fiction for the last two decades and has written thousands of reviews for companies like Publishers Weekly, The Chicago Tribune, Kirkus Reviews, and BarnesandNoble.com. In his free time, he reads.
Keep up with all of my blogs – as well as all of Barnes & Noble’s exclusive reviews, authors interviews, videos, promotions, and more – by following @BNBuzz on Twitter!
