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Inspired Correspondent
Open-Peacemind
Posts: 155
Registered: ‎11-19-2011

I wonder....

I wonder

I wonder always why this world was made,

why we walk this earth,

why we can talk,

why there are  different personalities,

why we can dance,

why some have to be lonely,

or sad,

or mad,

or poor,

or scared,

and I wonder why I wonder.

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
― Dr. Seuss
"It's your decision:
are you going to do the right or the wrong?"
~me
Inspired Bibliophile
GS2991
Posts: 2,590
Registered: ‎04-21-2011
0 Kudos

Re: I wonder....

I wonder the pain? Why it feels as so, So as a shadow , ever there ever hurting. I like it! Hope you don't mind my little bit. That could be an excercise! Adding little bits keeping the poem going... or not. Just me idea
Silence is golden,
Duck tape is silver.

Book Sharks: No need to breathe, just read!
Inspired Correspondent
Open-Peacemind
Posts: 155
Registered: ‎11-19-2011

Running

Good idea!!!

Thank you for giving a piece of your advice!!!

 

Running,Runnning,Gone

The world speeds by,

greens,grays,cars,people,

I run and run,

then dash,

up the steep hill,

and I stop at the top,

panting,

my breath white in the air,

I jog leisurely down the hill,

then again,

I go, 

runnning,

running,

gone.

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
― Dr. Seuss
"It's your decision:
are you going to do the right or the wrong?"
~me
Moderator
Brandi_R
Posts: 1,598
Registered: ‎10-19-2006
0 Kudos

Re: I wonder....

An introspective poem. Nice work. I wonder how this might change with more specificity. For example, giving a detail or two of different personalities might evoke the kind of contrast you mean with more clarity.

letterpressfiction.blogspot.com
Inspired Correspondent
Open-Peacemind
Posts: 155
Registered: ‎11-19-2011
0 Kudos

Re: I wonder....

Thank you for your critical feed back..

I really need critical feedback:smileyindifferent:

 

 

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
― Dr. Seuss
"It's your decision:
are you going to do the right or the wrong?"
~me